You may have already heard of Steak and BJ Day, it's supposedly the heterosexual male's answer to what they deem as a holiday where they get short changed; Valentine's Day. The argument is that Valentine's is all about pampering the ladies and keeping yourself out of trouble, so why not have a 'Men's Valentines Day' where they get what they desire; steaks and blow jobs?
Now firstly, I have to jump through a few fundamental problems with this notion:
1) Since when is Valentine's centered solely around heterosexual couples?
2) If you think it's a day where you give your lady everything and get nothing in return then that is a problem within your relationship and not the norm. Just as many girlfriends put in the effort to surprise their man with presents, a fancy dinner or something kinky like a strip-tease.
3) The idea behind Valentine's Day has never been the idolisation of women, originally it was to celebrate a Catholic saint whom was said to have sent love letters from jail while awaiting execution, although how much of this is myth and how much fact has never been determined. It soon became a holiday when lovers could express their affections towards one another and seeing as the holiday formed in the Middle ages and women's liberation in the Western world did not begin until the early 1900s it is ridiculous to suggest that this is a holiday devised to fulfill the needs of woman.
Okay, that aside, the major issue I have with this idea is it's sexist depiction of men. It belittles the heterosexual male by suggesting that he has primitive needs that are easily appeased much in the way we used to think a woman would be happy with flowers, a new apron or a toaster. Throw this man a piece of meat and a quick release and he is satiated, it tells us. He does not care for affection, love, presents, surprises or any other result of thoughtfulness. It depicts man more as a savage or an animal, easily distracted and contained.
This is a common weapon of discrimination and oppression throughout the ages, with women it was the aforementioned household trinkets, with African Americans it was fried chicken, with Jewish people it was money, there is a never ending list of similar stereotypes throughout history. These serve the purpose of creating a rift between "us" and "them" that then opens the door to discrimination without guilt, because after all you are just pointing out the obvious differences that separate us and them, right? Nothing prejudice about that surely?
But that is exactly what this notion does, it reduces man to a troglodyte who wants nothing beyond meat and blow jobs, not even intercourse, that would be too intimate. The stereotypical male is an oaf, a layabout who groans at the efforts he must go to obtain more meat, more blow jobs, more sex. He dreams of a less complicated world where all things exist to please his primitive tastes. Does this sound like any man you know? Does this sound like you?
Of course not, men are not slobbering apes they are capable, intelligent, dynamic and equal human beings. They have aspirations for their lives and the world, they are capable of love and affection, some of them are even vegetarian and don't care for meat at all! Don't sell yourself short men, don't stereotype yourselves to be useless and dimwitted because eventually you may just find that is exactly what you have become.
So my research into this eventually brought me to the founder of steak and a BJ Day, Tom Birdsey. Take a good hard look at the man. A morbidly obese American radio dj with long hair and a receding hairline. I tried to get a picture of him to post with the article but there weren't many going, but you can see some on his MySpace page amongst the videos of Shakira shaking her ass and the "bra bounce" video. Class. This is the man you are choosing to emulate when you take on these ideals, this is who you are listening to. Not someone I would personally choose to represent me but hey, that's me.
I know what you may be saying "Geeez Katie! Lighten up, it's just a joke" and I'm totally with you, it's humourous albeit at a redneck level and I especially enjoy the madness of it when I see items such as this up for sale. I have no idea who would be crazy enough to have there baby wear that but it sure would cause a reaction. But this has allowed me to make an important point about discrimination amongst genders. By pigeon holing each other (not a euphemism) we are creating barriers in our relationships. We are looking at one another with less empathy and more with an "us vs them" mentality.
In my humble opinion, Steak and BJ Day is nothing but a tool of oppression and discrimination concocted by a small-minded, self-loathing man who wishes to assert his idea of masculinity and authority by belittling and simplifying our perceptions of women, relationships and intimacy. In reality all he has achieved is to discriminate against his own audience of heterosexual males by depicting them as simplistic creatures which essentially makes them appear less than human. What do you think?
References:
http://www.breakfastmeat.com/steakandbjday.html
http://plancksconstant.org/blog1/2006/03/come_all_ye_faithful_steakbj_d.html
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=11727681804
http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day
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Now firstly, I have to jump through a few fundamental problems with this notion:
1) Since when is Valentine's centered solely around heterosexual couples?
2) If you think it's a day where you give your lady everything and get nothing in return then that is a problem within your relationship and not the norm. Just as many girlfriends put in the effort to surprise their man with presents, a fancy dinner or something kinky like a strip-tease.
3) The idea behind Valentine's Day has never been the idolisation of women, originally it was to celebrate a Catholic saint whom was said to have sent love letters from jail while awaiting execution, although how much of this is myth and how much fact has never been determined. It soon became a holiday when lovers could express their affections towards one another and seeing as the holiday formed in the Middle ages and women's liberation in the Western world did not begin until the early 1900s it is ridiculous to suggest that this is a holiday devised to fulfill the needs of woman.
Okay, that aside, the major issue I have with this idea is it's sexist depiction of men. It belittles the heterosexual male by suggesting that he has primitive needs that are easily appeased much in the way we used to think a woman would be happy with flowers, a new apron or a toaster. Throw this man a piece of meat and a quick release and he is satiated, it tells us. He does not care for affection, love, presents, surprises or any other result of thoughtfulness. It depicts man more as a savage or an animal, easily distracted and contained.
This is a common weapon of discrimination and oppression throughout the ages, with women it was the aforementioned household trinkets, with African Americans it was fried chicken, with Jewish people it was money, there is a never ending list of similar stereotypes throughout history. These serve the purpose of creating a rift between "us" and "them" that then opens the door to discrimination without guilt, because after all you are just pointing out the obvious differences that separate us and them, right? Nothing prejudice about that surely?
But that is exactly what this notion does, it reduces man to a troglodyte who wants nothing beyond meat and blow jobs, not even intercourse, that would be too intimate. The stereotypical male is an oaf, a layabout who groans at the efforts he must go to obtain more meat, more blow jobs, more sex. He dreams of a less complicated world where all things exist to please his primitive tastes. Does this sound like any man you know? Does this sound like you?
Of course not, men are not slobbering apes they are capable, intelligent, dynamic and equal human beings. They have aspirations for their lives and the world, they are capable of love and affection, some of them are even vegetarian and don't care for meat at all! Don't sell yourself short men, don't stereotype yourselves to be useless and dimwitted because eventually you may just find that is exactly what you have become.
So my research into this eventually brought me to the founder of steak and a BJ Day, Tom Birdsey. Take a good hard look at the man. A morbidly obese American radio dj with long hair and a receding hairline. I tried to get a picture of him to post with the article but there weren't many going, but you can see some on his MySpace page amongst the videos of Shakira shaking her ass and the "bra bounce" video. Class. This is the man you are choosing to emulate when you take on these ideals, this is who you are listening to. Not someone I would personally choose to represent me but hey, that's me.
I know what you may be saying "Geeez Katie! Lighten up, it's just a joke" and I'm totally with you, it's humourous albeit at a redneck level and I especially enjoy the madness of it when I see items such as this up for sale. I have no idea who would be crazy enough to have there baby wear that but it sure would cause a reaction. But this has allowed me to make an important point about discrimination amongst genders. By pigeon holing each other (not a euphemism) we are creating barriers in our relationships. We are looking at one another with less empathy and more with an "us vs them" mentality.
In my humble opinion, Steak and BJ Day is nothing but a tool of oppression and discrimination concocted by a small-minded, self-loathing man who wishes to assert his idea of masculinity and authority by belittling and simplifying our perceptions of women, relationships and intimacy. In reality all he has achieved is to discriminate against his own audience of heterosexual males by depicting them as simplistic creatures which essentially makes them appear less than human. What do you think?
References:
http://www.breakfastmeat.com/steakandbjday.html
http://plancksconstant.org/blog1/2006/03/come_all_ye_faithful_steakbj_d.html
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=11727681804
http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day
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